memori Bitter and sweet
Upside, downside, upchuck, uplift. Can you reach the heights when you have never swum in the sewage? You thought that in the sewer you'd only attract flies. In your dreams do you fly?
Cousin Fred pulled the wings off flies but he was loved and cherished because he was saved ( knew Jesus in his heart) he said, though that did not keep him out of the mental hospital after he raped those 2 girls. The mental hospital probably kept him out of the gas chamber after he shot his best friend dead. " Bye ,Bye, Billy can't say I missed you( even though I'd kissed you) but he should not have shot you, but he did. You can't do anything much about your relatives.
Now me I'm the black sheep of the family Pagan you know. Actually when the relatives were pissing themselves about my sinful ways I was a Buddhist but I am pagan now. Alive and happy long after almost all the good white sheep have died or simply destroyed themselves. Don't have many relatives waiting anymore with baited breath to see proof that I'm no good. They would hate to hear that I feel/ felt sorry for them. Pride, but No joy.
I hope Jesus is love, Was Love, for them because there was no other love to be found, but then I'm being judgemental . Perhaps under all the bitter gossip and finger pointing and superiority there was some secret store of kindness love and compassion. Some soaring center of blissful connection with angels . (Can You fly without wings?)
Perspire, retire, Aspire, inspire. Everything That lives, loves It takes a lot of work and constant effort to suck all pleasure out of a life/lives.
God/Goddess is here all around, all through, complete surrounding us in its all good beauty, wisdom, joy So I'm lazy and I'd rather love and live and feel the breeze on my face and sing and dance and hug . Blessings and pleasure is a lot easier to have than constant sorrow. I knew even when I was two that I was not a sinner there was not a sin I knew it in the part that knows God but my kin they struck fear into me mostly with the flat of their hands They did not hit me to hurt me they said but only so I'd give up my heretical sinful ways . I had a happy childhood I started having it when I was about 19 still having it now/ I can fly!